Here are some of the things you never want to say to me when I’m stressed out:
-“it’s going to be okay”
-“calm down”
-“just relax!” (my favorite)
I get it, all of these actually make sense and hey, I myself say those things all the time to other people or even to myself. When you’re under a lot of stress though and your body already feels tense, the last thing you want to hear is to “just relax!“- it’s sort of like telling someone who’s having a mild panic attack to “just stop feeling anxious!” It doesn’t work like that.
The other day I was freaking out about having to get an MRI done (super claustrophobic- I can’t even drive a car through extremely narrow roads without getting nauseous), and while everyone kept telling me to “just relax, it’s going to be okay” all I kept thinking was “noooo it’s not!!! I’m going to die a horrible and painful death while suffocating once that awful tube slowly shrinks and crushes me to pieces.”
I was on my way to a full-blown panic attack when my husband told me to“just breathe.” Then, I remembered that yeah, breathing deep is what I do, meditating, taking care of myself, these are all the habits I’ve been learning to adopt over the years. It’s those little rituals and routines that I should treat as tools for dealing with all this stress. I find that words “just breathe” are a lot more helpful since it actually gives the other person something to do, something to focus on.
Sometimes it feels like there’s just so much we need to worry about. While I felt like my entire life had to be put on hold since my accident, I also worry about work deadlines, getting things done, staying productive and healthy, now I also have to deal with a paralyzing fear of being crushed to death?!
I meannn…
So yes, if you’re feeling stressed out, I guess the good news is that you’re not alone. Stress is a such a big issue for us these days, bigger than it’s ever been. We all seem to be under so much pressure. We all also stress about many different things: work, school, relationships, health. Always chasing something bigger, something better.
Stress is your body’s way of responding to any kind of demand and it can manifest itself in many different ways- there are also some ways to reduce that stress in your life.
10 WAYS TO REDUCE STRESS IN YOUR LIFE
STRESS ASSESSMENT
In order to eliminate (or reduce) stress, you first need to identify major stressors in your life. Stress assessment is a very personal process. Take a close look at your daily routine and think about some of the things that often make you feel tense and stressed. Maybe it’s some of your relationships, certain behaviors, activities, places? Make a list of those things/activities and ask yourself how you can eliminate some of them from your life- some things you will not be able to change completely and finding a way to make them less stressful might take some thoughtful planning.
STICK TO A HEALTHY DIET
Here’s the thing with stress: it’s during those stressful moments when we usually reach for unhealthy foods. Then, we feel sluggish, tired and sometimes a bit guilty about… well, eating crap. Try to eat a little healthier- always keep a healthy snack in your bag/desk, so that you don’t reach for anything unhealthy when you get those sudden cravings. This REALLY doesn’t need to be complicated- I always have some berries and a handful of almonds with me. Stay away from processed foods and foods high in sugar, make sure that your diet is rich in foods that help fight stress, like:
-Avocado
-Dark chocolate
-Blueberries
-Dark leafy greens (like spinach)
Staying active is just as important- even if you only spend 20-30 minutes a day, doing some light exercising.
GET ORGANIZED
Clutter, I think we can all agree, adds unnecessary stress. Lack of organization is a part of all of our lives, to some extent. Over time, things just move around, get displaced, stacked up and messy. It’s natural. What’s a bit scary at times, is the rate at which that clutter accumulates. Dishes that you don’t feel like washing right after dinner stay in the sink until morning, only in the morning you’re running late and they have to wait until you get back from work early evening.
What’s one of the last things you feel like dealing with when coming home after a long day?
Yup, you guessed it: a pile of dirty dishes. This is why the clean-as-you-go concept, is so important. Not just when it comes to dishes, but everything else, too. When getting organized, start with the area where you spend most of your time- like your work desk. While I’m pretty good at unintentionally creating a ton of “organized mess” on my desk, I find that having a workspace that actually is clean and organized, helps me stay both creative and focused.
Think of organizing as a way of guarding your time.
CREATE + COMMIT TO A MORNING ROUTINE
Increase your morning stress and chances are it will carry on throughout the day. Not having to rush means that you won’t be running late and adding more unnecessary stress to your day. Create a morning routine and set a good tone for the rest of your day. This will help you eliminate stress before it even happens.
SLOW DOWN
It’s not easy to notice the good if we’re constantly chasing something better. Learn to take and do things slowly and try not to rush through life too much. Enjoy your food, savor that book, take time to enjoy nature, pay attention to the people around you.
SIMPLIFY
One of the easiest ways to reduce stress is to simplify as much as possible. Don’t overcomplicate things. Get rid of clutter, delete all the apps you don’t use from your phone, simplify your wardrobe by getting rid of old and unloved clothes (this will make simple things like getting dressed in the mornings much easier). Simplifying also means reducing your commitments, tuning out unnecessary noise and distractions. Think of simplifying as editing your life- edit it frequently and have a little “cleanse” once in a while.
SCHEDULE MINI BREAKS
Good time management is key and hey, I personally don’t know what I’d do without time-blocking. I schedule everything, even short breaks during my work day. By doing this, I avoid both procrastination and a burnout. Sometimes, I also take time to “unschedule” things, too; learning to say “no” is just as important.
SINGLE TASKING
The more you need to get done, more overwhelmed and stressed you probably find yourself feeling. There are times when your to do list is so long, the only way you think you can tackle it is by doing everything at once. The thing about multitasking is that we all think we’re good at it. Truth is, for most people, multitasking increases stress levels. While it might seem productive, multitasking is actually less-efficient and makes you more prone to making errors.
TAKE A DEEP BREATH
Don’t underestimate the power of a good, deep breath, yo! Every hour or so, take a minute to stop and breathe. Take a few deep breaths, have a gentle stretch. If you can’t remember to do this on top of every hour, set hourly reminders for yourself on your phone. If you suddenly start feeling stressed at work- go outside or a different room and take a few deep breaths. A good cuddle is another thing you shouldn’t underestimate.
CHANGE YOUR UNHEALTHY BELIEFS
You guys know that I’m a huge believer in positive affirmations. I know that stress can manifest itself in many different ways and development of unhealthy habits is one of them. I specifically mean the way we sometimes make ourselves feel small when we feel either stressed or under pressure. We use words like “I can’t” a lot more often during times of stress. Recently, I also talked about perfectionism, and that’s another habit/belief that often limits us: if I can’t do this perfectly, then I won’t do it at all. Learning to let go, changing these habits and beliefs, can alone make a big difference.
DON’T MAKE YOURSELF FEEL SMALL!! Don’t think that just because you’re feeling stressed or tired, or burned out, it makes you weak. It doesn’t make you any less productive, ambitious or driven. We all have shit to deal with and even though sometimes you might feel small, alone, overwhelmed or tired, know that you are not alone in this.
I’d be great if every time we feel stressed, we could take an afternoon off, book a massage, take a bath or plan a weekend getaway. That’s just not realistic. It’s important to have a variety of these strategies as ways to reduce stress- sort of like a toolbox for stressful times. Some other things that work for me are talking it out with someone close (someone whose mindset at the time is a bit more positive than mine), going to bed early and letting go.
How do you guys cope with stress?
31 Comments
missgetaway
August 24, 2017 at 3:16 amTHANK YOU SO MUCH! I’m currently in the last week of my Bachelor’s thesis writing and I’m so darn stressed out. Sadly I do not have the time to take an entire afternoon off right now – something that is always recommended online. So thank you for sharing realistic and yet helpful ways to de-stress.
Love, kerstin
http://www.missgetaway.com/
Paula @ lifestylegleam.com
August 26, 2017 at 1:21 pmAhh I remember those days, you got this though! I’m sure you’ll do great and will feel amazing once you’re done! Good luck!
Demilade Aina
August 24, 2017 at 3:22 amThese tips are all so wonderful. I love the one about learning to simplify, I’m definitely going to keep that in mind. You’re right about decluttering, when my surroundings are disorganized, it genuinely stresses me out. I’ve also been reminding myself to slow down as I tend to be in a rush a lot and it never ends well haha. Lots of love Paula <3
Coco Bella Blog
Paula @ lifestylegleam.com
August 26, 2017 at 1:22 pmI’m the same way- I can’t concentrate in a messy environment ;)
Aleksandra // bunniesaremagic
August 24, 2017 at 4:05 amI almost died from panic when I had my MRI, so I completely understand you!m This bloody thing is so loud and I am very much not a person you want to lock up in a small space.
Paula @ lifestylegleam.com
August 26, 2017 at 1:22 pmMine just got rescheduled for last week (was supposed to be today) so I’m even more stressed out now that I have to wait another week!
Aleksandra // bunniesaremagic
September 5, 2017 at 3:43 amI hope it all went well for you! :)
Paula @ lifestylegleam.com
September 20, 2017 at 12:32 pmIt did! I survived haha :)
Aleksandra // bunniesaremagic
September 23, 2017 at 8:01 amVery glad to hear that! And now you can cross it out of your bucket list, haha.
Kiri Yanchenko
August 24, 2017 at 7:50 amAh I totally need this post in my life as just a simple reminder to slow down and calm down.
My own personal projects, the blog and work is like CRAZY and I run the risk of burning out.
I must do everything – comment on blogs, draft my own, write the posts I have for other people, go to the gym.. Only then do I feel like I am achieving my goals.
I am eating healthy – great tip btw.
And yes just breathe.
A friend also shared the put your x cap on… now change the cap to a y cap depending on the task.
I hope you got through the MRI ok?
Kiri
Set to Glow
http://www.settoglow.com.au
Deanna Marie
August 24, 2017 at 8:58 amYour mental health posts are my favourite! I struggle with anxiety/depression too, and honestly, hearing “just relax” is the worst!! I love your suggestion to declutter – it’s so true. When I’m at my most anxious, I always tend to be a little more messy. Lovely, realistic post! :)
http://www.luxandvitae.com
Paula @ lifestylegleam.com
August 26, 2017 at 1:24 pmSo happy to hear you enjoy these posts, Deanna, thank you! I hope you’re doing well- dealing with these things and stress that comes with them is never fun- especially when you hear “just relax” haha honestly, the last thing you want to say to me when I’m upset.
Natalie Redman
August 24, 2017 at 10:05 amGreat post! Very good tips.
http://www.upyourvlog.com
Paula @ lifestylegleam.com
August 26, 2017 at 1:24 pmThanks Natalie!
Very Much Mia
August 24, 2017 at 11:18 am“Just relax”…ugh! I hate that one! These tips were really helpful and I definitely think that slowing down and sticking to a healthy diet are very important for stress relief. I used to stress-eat junk foods when I was stressed, but that only made me feel a million times worst! When I continue eating well, I feel SO much better and more confident.
Mia | http://www.verymuchmia.com
Paula @ lifestylegleam.com
August 26, 2017 at 1:25 pmI do too haha :) I used to “eat” my stress too and it’s definitely something that makes everything much worse. Changing my diet did so much for me- including better sleep and improved mood, for sure.
Samantha Frances
August 24, 2017 at 2:54 pmI love this! I honestly cannot get anything done if my environment is messy, it just clouds my brain and makes me feel like I can’t get my bearings. If ever I feel overwhelmed I definitely agree that just stopping and breathing helps so much. It helps me to focus and calmed down <3 wonderful post! xxx
http://www.samanthafrances.co.uk
Paula @ lifestylegleam.com
August 26, 2017 at 1:26 pmYup, same here. I get so upset by mess and cannot concentrate haha :)
Florence And Constance
August 24, 2017 at 4:56 pmGreat post! For me, organisation and creating a plan is very important.
https://harryssisters.blogspot.co.uk/
Paula @ lifestylegleam.com
August 26, 2017 at 1:26 pmSame here! Both can make a big difference. x
charlotte carter
August 25, 2017 at 9:38 amGreat points sweet!! Love this post! I always try and slow things down when it get on top of me and stressful!!
a life of a charlotte
x
Paula @ lifestylegleam.com
August 26, 2017 at 1:31 pmSlowing down is such an important thing to remember, especially these days when we’re all in such a rush.
KhloeLo
August 25, 2017 at 12:37 pmStress is a thing I feel each and everyday and it’s so tiring. I am gonna try your tips here<3
Xoxo,Khloe
http://khloelocom.weburl.ro/21-lessons-learned-turned-21-years-old/
Paula @ lifestylegleam.com
August 26, 2017 at 1:31 pmSorry you have to deal with so much stress, Khloe, hope some of these tips help you out!
Naya // partyparrotblog.com
August 26, 2017 at 4:04 amFabulous post Paula, I might sound like a broken record, but as always – every single point makes sense. Especially one about breathing. I need to do an MRI too, but I am so scared! I keep on postponing it, which is stupid, because the only thing that stops me is my fear of being trapped inside. Gosh, I need to revisit your post once again before I do that! xx
Paula @ lifestylegleam.com
August 26, 2017 at 1:33 pmAww thank you so much Naya!! Mine just got postponed (it was supposed to be today) and I’m so upset I’ll need to wait another week in anticipation. I kind of just want to know what’s wrong with my spine, too- it sucks not knowing what’s wrong with you or why you’re in pain. I’m going in next Saturday, will let you know how it goes!
Naya // partyparrotblog.com
August 27, 2017 at 3:48 amOh, hate when that happens, but I always think that even last minute changes like this are for good. Definitely keep me posted! xx
Serena
August 29, 2017 at 9:15 amI loved this blogpost, Paula! I’ve been very stressed lately and could really use those tips! I will apply them asap x
http://www.serenbird.com
Paula @ lifestylegleam.com
September 20, 2017 at 12:32 pmThank you, Serena!! Hope you’re doing well and feeling a bit better!
Vera Da Silva
September 6, 2017 at 9:05 amLove your posts Paula. You’re such an inspiration!
Your posts always help me feeling bether on a bad day… and on the good days too ;-) Thank you for being there
xoxo
Paula @ lifestylegleam.com
September 20, 2017 at 12:31 pmSuch a kind thing to say, thank you so much!!!!