Is removing negativity from your life possible?
Well, it is impossible to remove ALL negativity from your life.
Happiness almost never equals a picture-perfect life where things never go wrong, where you don’t ever get angry, sad or frustrated. Or disappointed.
That’s not what being more “positive” or “happy” is about.
It’s about realizing that “happiness” means different things to all of us.
It is also about the realization that sometimes, removing negativity from your life takes work, a lot of change and sometimes, a little sacrifice here and there.
7 TIPS FOR REMOVING NEGATIVITY FROM YOUR LIFE
PAY ATTENTION TO THE WAY YOU “SPEAK” TO YOURSELF
Not surprisingly, a lot of the negativity in our lives comes from the people closest to us: ourselves. A lot of times, the things we say to ourselves, aren’t very positive. What’s even worse, we don’t really see anything wrong with that. It’s become somewhat of a second nature to us.
How often do we pat ourselves on the back for doing something well? For many of us, negative self-talk is such a constant part of our lives that we often don’t even realize just how negative we tend to be toward ourselves and how unnatural being “nice” or rewarding yourself can sometimes feel. Until you recognize and acknowledge those negative thoughts and their patterns, you might not even be aware they actually exist. They’re often repetitive and pretty much always unproductive.
When you notice and acknowledge those habitual patterns- be mindful of them. Simply observe them. When you think: “I’m not good enough” or “I can’t do this, I give up” recognize that it’s just a thought: “I’m having a thought that I’m not good enough“, “I’m having a thought that I can’t do this, I’m having a thought that I want to give up.”
It’s just a thought, not your truth. Realize this, work on it, and you’re one step closer to removing negativity from your life.
REMOVING NEGATIVITY FROM YOUR LIFE: BE STILL
One of the easy ways to feel happy, right this moment, is learning how to be still. Listen to your thoughts, feel yourself breathing. You run around all day, working, taking care of others, trying to meet the deadlines, making sure all your chores are done. For a few minutes a day, try being still. Try not to think about what else needs to get done.
When you feel like your life is going by too fast, each day not much different from the other, just take a minute and be still, peaceful. When you start feeling angry or frustrated, stressed, or overwhelmed by any negativity, take a moment to be still, to slow down.
STOP TAKING THINGS PERSONALLY
Easier said than done, yes. We actually just talked about it not that long ago in this post. When you take things personally, you’re allowing another person to take control of your own emotions. You cannot depend on other people for your happiness. That is giving up a whole lot of power; you begin to question yourself, your feelings or accomplishments, through someone else. You’re allowing other people to tell you who you are or what you should or shouldn’t do.
Truth is, not everyone has to agree with you or your decisions or even like you. The important thing to remember is to not take those things personally and not give others the power to control your emotions.
SURROUND YOURSELF WITH THINGS AND PEOPLE YOU LOVE
Learning to not respond to negativity is one of the most difficult changes you can make. It’s also one of the most important things to learn when it comes to removing negativity from your life. Especially when you’re surrounded with people who are passionate and often outspoken about their views or opinions. I’m sure that you can think of at least one person who has that effect on you and triggers all kinds of negative emotions. Frequently, your first instinct when dealing with a person like that is wanting to defend yourself or your decisions; to argue, to try to make a point. Why would you willingly put yourself in those situations in the first place?
Gossip, complaining, nagging and negative thinking- these are things that we all do from time to time. Rather than focusing on those sources of negative emotions, try to steer the conversation into a more neutral ground, or just simply avoid being around those people.
Bring more love into your daily life by filling your day with things, people, conversations and places you love. Think about what are some things that always put a smile on your face? Remember that YOUR life is what YOU make it.
SET HEALTHY BOUNDARIES
Avoid burning out by setting up healthy boundaries in your life; both personal and professional. You can’t control the negativity of other people, but you can control how long you’re willing to participate in it. Some people tend to drain every bit of positive energy out of you.
What are some things or habits that no longer serve you? Are you always running late? Do you struggle with others often interrupting you while you’re working or trying to get some rest? Turn off your phone, set those boundaries and make them clear.
Take time to take care of yourself. Your body, as well as your mind and your soul. Sometimes this involves disconnecting from everything and everyone.
MAKE TIME FOR DAILY GOAL CHECK-INS
We all have all these dreams and goals yet most of us complain about the lack of time to pursue them. Scheduling a daily goal check-in, even if it’s just an hour a day, can help you stay on track with your intentions and plans for the future.
How does this help remove negativity from your life? It’s simple: it keeps you motivated and helps you hold yourself accountable. I’m sure that many of you can relate to the feeling of months, years passing by, yet you notice that you, yourself, haven’t grown or done the things you intended. Hold yourself accountable for your actions. Have daily check-ins and keep yourself disciplined. Don’t wait for things to just “happen” to you- make things happen.
SPREAD YOUR SPARKLE
A lot of us have that one person in our lives, who always has a smile on their face. Someone who lifts you high and gets just as excited about your goals, accomplishments, and plans for the future, as you do. These are the kind of people you want to surround yourself with.
What if you don’t have a person like this in your life?
Well, if you don’t think you have such a person in your life, become that person for others. We are naturally attracted to people who give off vibes similar to ours, so the more positive and happy things you pay attention to, the more positive people you will find yourself around. Spread your sparkle.
Happiness means different things to all of us. The “negativity” we so often talk about, can sometimes even go unnoticed for years. There are so many things that used to never bother me years ago (like gossiping among friends, constant complaining, and comparison to other people) that I now cannot stand. I can now literally feel my energy levels change whenever I find myself in a situation that is even slightly negative. We can live our lives, surrounded by negativity and not even realize it. This is why practicing mindfulness and being still are so important.
You can find magic in your “everyday” life, as long as you know where to look, as long as you keep seeking, stay grateful and practice more mindfulness.
19 Comments
Jen Lawrence
June 12, 2018 at 2:58 pmLove this.
Kelly
June 13, 2018 at 1:06 amI love your posts like this! I definitely need to stop taking things so personally. I take a lot of things said to heart and I know it’s definitely not healthy.
Perfect Shade of Mauve
Kelly
June 12, 2018 at 8:04 pmI love your posts like this! I definitely need to stop taking things so personally. I take a lot of things said to heart and I know it’s definitely not healthy.
Perfect Shade of Mauve
Paula Loreti
June 12, 2018 at 9:45 pmNumber two is a thing that I have to work SO much on. I think all of the tips are super positive and they’ll really help. Thanks for sharing your awesome wisdom, as always!
http://www.blossomikebana.com
Linda Libra Loca
June 13, 2018 at 7:33 amThe more aware we become of our personal energy, the easier it gets to identify negativity and take action. I had things that I was sure wouldn't bother me in my life for years, but it made such a difference after they were gone!
Anne|Linda, Libra, Loca
Gallantly, gal
June 13, 2018 at 12:04 pmAw such a great post!!! I think I put too much negativity in my life. The universe does its fair share of that for everybody without us putting more on ourselves, right? We can learn to respond better ><
Thanks for this awesome list!
https://gallantlygal.com
Julia Speaks
June 13, 2018 at 4:26 pmI really feel like I need this post at the moment – when things don’t go as planned in your life you can’t help but think it’s your fault, feel guilty and want to give up. However you are right on your first point, it’s just a thought. If we work on the way we think about ourselves, it can make such a difference on our mindset and then on our actual life! :)
Julia x
Last Post: The Makeup Products That Never Fail Me | http://juliaspeaksbeauty.blogspot.com/2018/06/beauty-makeup-products-that-never-fail.html
Danielle Alexa
June 13, 2018 at 2:57 pmI loved reading this blog post. I think it is so important to cut negativity from your life!
Danielle xx
https://www.fashionbeautyblog.co.uk/
Julia Speaks
June 13, 2018 at 4:26 pmI really feel like I need this post at the moment – when things don’t go as planned in your life you can’t help but think it’s your fault, feel guilty and want to give up. However you are right on your first point, it’s just a thought. If we work on the way we think about ourselves, it can make such a difference on our mindset and then on our actual life! :)
Julia x
Last Post: The Makeup Products That Never Fail Me | http://juliaspeaksbeauty.blogspot.com/2018/06/beauty-makeup-products-that-never-fail.html
kate / 35mminstyle
June 13, 2018 at 5:57 pmI absolutely loved this post!! especially the last part – it’s very empowering and very true. it’s time to stop complaining, react instead! again great post!
xx from italy
Cate 35mm in Style
Nikol Hess
June 14, 2018 at 2:46 amHi Paula, this blog post came in the right time. So many bad things have happend during last few months in my life. I cant describe how frustrated, sad and dissapointed I am. Because of people around me and myself included which is the worst I think. Every single day I complain about my life. And all these thoughts are negative. Of course. But I realized that my mind si stuck in negativity for many years! I personally thing that I need some kind of restart in my life. But dont know where, when and how to begin. Thank you for helping me out through your blog post
Aleksandra // bunniesaremagic
June 14, 2018 at 9:06 amAnyone that struggles with faking the smile till them making it should work in customer service for a while. I actually cannot rid myself of a smile most of the time. it really ingrains in your muscles :)
Genesis Garcia
June 14, 2018 at 11:13 amSelf love is so important and from there comes the way you talk to yourself. Just trying your best to bring out the positive thoughts and believe in yourself can make such a difference, it’s difficult for sure but trying is an important baby step! Loved this post!
Becca
June 14, 2018 at 3:08 pmI totally agree with your tip ‘stop taking things personally’ – it’s so hard to do, but once you manage it it really does make all the difference!
Becca // http://becc4.co.uk
chloelxuise
June 15, 2018 at 6:28 amI take so many things personally that I really shouldn’t ! I feel like I overthink the littlest of things, and I need to stop in order to be more positive!
Chloe X http://chloelxuise.com
Yourbeautypantry
June 15, 2018 at 10:05 amI have been learning positive self talk and it’s amazing. It’s makes a difference in your life.
http://www.yourbeautypantry.com
Naya // partyparrotblog.com
June 18, 2018 at 4:32 amFeels like I needed to read something like this today, thank you for being so inspiring Paula! I have to say that rules one and three are very important to me personally. I am my own worst critic at times and I tend to take things personally; even if we’re talking about some strangers and not close people in our lives. Two things I have to work on this year xx
The Sunday Mode
June 19, 2018 at 8:33 amThis is exactly what I needed to write, especially the part about not taking things personally because that’s something I really struggle so much with.
Julia // The Sunday Mode
Natalie Redman
June 20, 2018 at 9:36 amGreat post, love spread your sparkle :D
http://www.upyourvlog.com